Not To Be Confused With
by TFRiD Queen
Summary: It wasn't her fault, really; no, it was because those two just happened to look so similar, how could she be blamed for making such a mistake? Adam/Sio, humorous smut, toys.


**A/N: This idea randomly popped into my head because sometimes my brain tells me to do things. It's a bit of a more...kinky piece, but it's also meant to be humorous while sexy at the same time. Obviously NSFW with explicit sexual content, but the 'kink' here is that this is the first time I will write a mature piece with 'toys'; nothing super-weird, but ah, let's just say, if you're not comfortable with someone using an object of some sort to please themselves, you may want to shy away.**

* * *

><p>They came in a set of two, nicely packaged and wrapped with a silk <em>furoshiki<em> and topped with a short thank-you note. Dai Zhong of the Third Platoon was a man of few words, but apparently he never forgot gratitude when it was deserved. The last mission having been a somewhat joint operation between her and the members of the Third-Dai Zhong, Hackenschmidt and the shorter-than-her Rasputin-Sio was surprised to find the gift waiting on her desk, having apparently been delivered while she was cleaning up in the shower.

Unfortunately, while the Chinese man remembered to thank his comrades, he might've overestimated their knowledge when it came to foreign, exotic things. Such as these two smooth, metal balls that were now sitting in her hand, decorated with a beautiful pattern of yin and yang. A bit on the heavy side but not unpleasant, the sniper rolled them around absentmindedly in her hand, enjoying the smooth motions while wondering just what exactly these were.

_'Eto...are you just supposed to...roll them in your hands like this? Wonder what's the point...'_ Maybe it was one of those things to balance out your 'qi', that martial artists always liked to blather about in those kung-fu films.

As she traced the smooth metal surfaces however, for some reason her mind recalled this one obscure piece of 'naughty' information, something she'd learned randomly (and then immediately regretted it) when she and the rest of the platoon were unwinding after a long day, drinking in the lounge.

_'Y'know, they sell these little balls that you can actually put in...you-know-where...'_ Her blonde teammate had whispered into her ear that one time, then giggled madly while Sio broke out into a furious blush.

She looked down at the balls in her hand. _'These couldn't be...the same thing, could they?!'_ On one hand, it wasn't much of a secret that she and the Ripper had something going on, but Dai Zhong never struck her as the type to nose in others' businesses, much less be close enough to give a gift of that type. Gandhi would be the most likely culprit, but even he wouldn't give it as a serious present, instead as a prank or joke.

In all likelihood, these were probably just some nice decorations or, er...Sio wasn't actually sure what they were for, then. But, the more she toyed with the balls and idea, the more her curiosity grew...they were rather on the larger side, but certainly couldn't be any bigger than _his_...right?

A sudden wave a of heat flooded her lower regions and she gulped nervously._ 'What the hell...it couldn't...hurt to at least, try, right?'_ Granted, this was the first time she'd used anything other than her own (or his) body to pleasure herself, but for some reason the idea of doing something so new, and potentially kinky, was kind of exciting.

At the very least, if she decided she didn't like it, then they would just be kept on display in her room and nobody would be any wiser.

_'I'm a growing girl...there's nothing wrong with a little exploration of your own sexuality...'_ Mind made up, she dropped the towel and settled herself nicely onto the pillows, wondering just how the heck she should even do this. Hmm, they were smooth enough, though she feared it might be a little too cold at first. Hesitantly she licked the cool surface, then proceeded to cover the entire thing as best she could with her own saliva, licking and coating it until it was slick and somewhat warmer.

"Here goes nothing," she muttered to herself, before placing one of the balls down and gently pushing it towards her entrance, which was already slick with her own fluids. "A-Ah...it's still a little too cold..." Though just rolling the ball around the outside was already causing her to mewl and pant, still she hesitated a bit, wondering if it really was a good idea to put this...thing inside her.

_'A little at a time...aahh, it's actually going in-!'_ Slowly, ever so slowly did she ease the metal orb in, shuddering and moaning slightly as her muscles did in fact, expand to accommodate the sphere. "Eek, it's s-so cold...b-but it kinda, feels good too..."

Just to be on the safe side, the sniper made sure it was still within fairly easy access. After all, it hadn't exactly occurred to her just what would happen if it went _all_ the way inside-

**Knockknockknock**. "Oy squirt, yeh done yet or not? Everybody's waitin' on ya t' start tea!"

"_Uwa!_ J-Jack-san, w-wait, I'm still getting dressed-!" At the sound of her passcode being inputed however, she panicked and in one movement the metal ball slid fully inside with a neat 'shloop' and she gasped half out of shock, half out of ectasy. _'Oh crap, it went in! Oh shit...what am I gonna do?!'_

"'S that so? Well hurry it up, we ain't got all day..."

"R-Right, sorry!" Ah, talk about the worst timing possible; still, there was no point in trying to figure out how to get it out now, maybe after tea time when everybody retired to their own rooms...

"_Ooh_...damn, i-it, feels..._weird_..." Her knees buckled and she had to hold onto the edge of the desk to stay upright. Funny how despite its weight and the natural force of gravity, the ball was not actually falling out. Instead, with each movement of her legs and pelvis, it rolled back and forth slightly, sending a tingly wave of pleasure up and down her spine. _'Oh god...Sio, you stupid, stupid fool! Why'd you have to go and do this to yourself?!'_

As she hurriedly flung on her uniform, all the while trying not to moan with each excessive movement, she cursed inwardly at her own naïve curiosity and scarily-high libido. Sometimes after battles, she admitted to feeling rather...horny, but this was also the first time she'd ever done something like this. It was more than a little concerning, to say the least.

"Jesus, thought you'd passed out or something," the man muttered as Sio showed her face at last, although given how bright red she seemed, that might've been a possibility. "Uh, are you feelin' all right? Yeh look flushed..."

"I-I-I'm perfectly, fine! I just...turned the heater up too high. Y-You know, it being colder now and all that...ah ha ha..." She laughed nervously while he eyed her with a stare that clearly said, 'yeah right.'

"...Sure, whatever squirt." As the two of them walked out to the galley though, Sio couldn't help but fall behind, not being able to keep up with the faster pace lest she turn into a hot, writhing mess on the floor. "...Hey." He came to a sudden stop and she nearly crashed into him. "Are you really feeling okay?"

"U-U-Uh..." The answer to that was no, she was most definitely _not_ okay, but it wasn't entirely unpleasant, either.

Unfortunately, Sio was also a terrible liar.

He frowned and his silver brows furrowed. "Did you catch a cold? I told yeh not t' walk around without yer jacket when we're on the deck! C'mon, you're going straight back to bed-I'll tell the others you're not feelin' well."

"A-Ah, b-b-but wait, Jack-san!"

"No 'buts'; 'f yeh want somethin' I'll save you some and bring it up later."

It was useless to argue against him, especially since she was already being carried and hauled off to her room. At least she could have the privacy of figuring out how to get it out now, she supposed...or...

_'Uh oh; what if I can't get it out...then what?!'_

But it was nice, being doted on like this as if she were just a normal high school girl, with a gruff but secretly caring boyfriend who was scolding her while tucking her in at the same time.

"Now you just rest and stay quiet; I'll come by in a bit t' check on you and, if yer lucky, Newton might've saved a few biscuits. Can't promise anything though."

"...Thanks, Adam..."

His cheeks flushed that cute pink and she couldn't help but giggle, despite the situation. "Y-Yeah, sure...just, ping me 'f yeh need anything..."

Her door slid shut and she heaved a sigh. Right, to attend to the matter at hand. Quickly she undid her slacks, tossing aside the underwear that was already soaked. "Okay, now just don't panic, this can't be impossible, you just...need to stay, calm..."

Gingerly she reached her fingers underneath and gave an experimental poke. _'Ah...I can feel it, but...how to actually get it out...!'_ Suffice to say, unless she could fit her entire hand in, there was no way she could get a sufficient grip around the object, it being far too smooth and large.

"Oh no...no no no, this can't be-_hnng_-happening!" In fact, the more she tried to reach it, the more aroused she was making herself and in turn, the deeper her own inner muscles pulled the sphere. "Ack, stop doing that, stupid body!"

Panting, the sniper lay on her side, fingers already far too slick to even think about gripping that smooth, slippery sphere. Great, just great...not only was it looking to be an impossible task, but she was painfully turned on now, to boot. _'What to do, what to do...'_

Groaning, Sio weakly reached for her personal comm, while unconsciously rubbing her clit to relieve the pressure. As mortifying as this scenario was, he was the only person she could even dream of asking to help...whatever that might mean. In any case, it wasn't as if she had anymore ideas left.

**Recipient: Jack**  
><strong>Sender: Nobunagun<strong>  
><strong>[hey can you come up for a sec]<strong>

As soon as she hit send, the device was flung aside in favor of using both hands to touch herself, one to play with her stiff breasts while the other firmly stationed itself between her legs. _'Oh god...please hurry, Adam...!'  
><em>-  
>"Ah, Sio's not feeling well? That's too bad..." The remaining three members of the Second Platoon gathered for their daily afternoon tea, completely unaware of the situation currently plaguing their sniper.<p>

"Hnn, told her t' watch herself...well, I don't think it's too serious as long as she-hang on," his comm chirped and he idly scanned the message while refilling his teacup. "...or, not." His lips drew into a thin line as he wondered what the sniper could possibly need.

"What's wrong? Does Sio-chan want her biscuits before Newton eats them all?" The Indian quickly ducked to the side as the blonde made a jab for his ribs. "Ah, I'm just kidding-!"

"Who knows; in any case, I might as well..." Stacking a few of the baked goods onto a small plate and balancing a cup of tea in one hand, he slowly made his way to the sniper's room, careful not to spill anything as he carefully entered the code. "Oy squirt, couldn't wait for yer-what the-!"

Had it not been for his training, the teacup and plate might've shattered already, but as it was Adam managed to at least set them down onto the desk before rushing over to the sniper, who was currently as flushed and breathless as he'd ever seen her, squirming underneath the covers. "Sio, what's wrong-are you in pain? What's going on?!"

"_Haah, ah_-A-Adam, s-sorry for, c-c-alling you all of a sudden-"

"Nevermind that, yeh don't look so good..." Had she suddenly taken a turn for worse? Was it more than just a cold? But how could she have gotten sicker so quickly in just the span of half an hour?

"I-I-I, it's...w-well, it's kind of-_hhnng_-c, complicated..." She was panting like she'd just run an entire marathon, faced buried into her pillow as she moaned-not quite sounding like in pain?

Adam was getting more and more confused by the second. "...Okay...but first, you're not...hurt or anythin', are you?"

She shook her head, biting her lip as she looked like she was about to cry out of sheer...frustration? "N-No, I'm, I'm not sick or, hurt...j-just, I..."

"Yes?" Slowly he sat on the edge of the bed and smoothed her hair, hoping to coax her into a calmer state. "...What is it, then?"

"I-I...it's, well, really embarrassing...b-but, I really need your help-_aah_-so, s-so, promise me...y-you won't, th-think I'm a freak or l-laugh at me..." At this the sniper whined and her chin wobbled, but he quickly wiped up the single tear that was threatening to fall.

_Make fun of her?_ Sure, the teasing was what built their relationship in the first place, but even he wasn't that heartless to act so crudely around her, not when she was clearly distressed about something. "Heh, yer worryin' too much, squirt. Just tell me what's up, and I'll uh, help to the best of my abilities...I hope." Inwardly though, his nerves were starting to scramble. What could she possibly even mean by that? Suddenly Adam wondered if he'd been too rash in just promising her that he could solve whatever it was that she was upset about.

"Y-You...promise?"

"Yeh; tell you what, 'f somehow I don't hold up my end of the bargain, I'll give you all my scones at tomorrow's tea. Deal?"

Even with the tears, Sio couldn't help the smile her lips were pulling up into. Of all the people she knew, he was the only one she'd ever trust with everything, even a scenario like this. "O-Okay...deal." Sitting up, she leaned against the headboard, still wrapped in the comforter. "N-Now, I-I, uh...please, just...don't, freak out or, or say anything...until I'm, d-done, explaining...okay?"

The silver hair nodded once, as he gently took her hand and stroked the palm with his fingers in a soothing manner.

"S-So...I-I, uh...well, you know how, today I was with the Third Platoon, r-right? Anyway, s-so, I came back, and Dai Zhong left me a gift." Another nod, asking her to continue. "A-And, they were these...I-I'd never seen them before, but, they're kinda like, these two, metal balls...a-and then, I, I..."

Somehow this was turning out to be much harder than she'd imagined it in her head. She gulped nervously and glanced away; if she was going to tell him, there was no way she could look at him in the eye while doing so.

"...And? So, he gave you these...metal balls...?" Another reassuring pat, although at the moment Sio felt anything but reassured.

"I-I...I..." No more stalling; if she were ever to resolve this situation, she couldn't afford to be embarrassed. Swallowing her pride, she gripped his hand tightly as the last, most crucial part spilled out in one word:

"Iputtheballinsideme."

The emerald blinked back at her a few times. He was used to this, her hurried, single-sentence-word-vomit whenever she was extremely nervous about something, but even he had to do a double-take. Had he heard correctly? Did she really just say something about _putting the ball inside her?_

"Uh, I'm sorry, but...did you just say you..." Even his cheeks were flushing and a weird feeling was sinking into the pit of his stomach. "...You, put this ball..._inside_ you...?"

"...Yes..."

"...Where...exactly..."

She dropped the comforter and Adam wasn't sure what shocked him more; the fact that she was entirely naked underneath or the fact that she was very clearly, very painfully aroused. "...In, _there_," she pointed to that single junction between her legs, which was dripping wet.

_Oh god_...he felt his head spin and all the blood rush to...somewhere else. "I-I, y-you-I don't-Sio are you serious, why...why would you do something like this?! I can't even-!" Standing, he had to stick his head out the porthole and take a couple of deep breaths. _'This can't be happening; she did not just shove a bloody metal ball up her...and now it's probably...!'_

"...And let me guess; it's stuck and yeh can't get it out, can you?"

"...I'm sorry..."

"Sorry?! I don't-why would you even do this in the first place?" Despite the fact that he just promised he wouldn't freak out, Adam freaked out anyway; really, what was she thinking, sticking foreign objects in certain places that they were _very clearly not meant for? _

"I don't _know_-" Another wail from the girl and she really started crying this time, but he was too worked up to stop.

"-you don't know?! Okay, okay I-I get that, you know, it's..._normal_ to have, urges, but c'mon, didn't your parents ever teach you not to stick things where they don't belong? Like, oh I don't know, your private parts?!"

"...b-but, don't people...y-you know, stick th-things like, vibrators and stuff in there-"

He nearly had another heart attack as he heard his sweet, apparently not-so-innocent little girlfriend talk about sex toys. "I-I-those are different!"

"They are?"

"Yes, yes they are..."

"...Are you speaking from personal experience?"

"I-what the bloody hell gave you that idea?! I do not-just _no_." Heaving, he forced himself to calm down, especially after seeing how distraught she was. _'Shit, I yelled at her...when I promised I wouldn't...fuck me.'_

Sio sniffled and blew her nose into a tissue. "...Y-You, promised you wouldn't, freak out...and now, you're yelling at me...I-I know it wasn't a good idea, b-but, I...thought they were, something, else..."

Sighing, he ran his fingers through his silver locks and grabbed the tissue box and set it on the bed. "...Okay, you're right; I'm sorry for being an ass and overreacting. It's just...well, suffice t' say, you gave me quite a shock..."

"I...know. B-But, you're the only one I...could, ask..."

He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. "I know; and, like I said, I'll...try and help you. But, I have to admit, I'm...not really well-versed in this, particular area..." Patting her hair, he wiped up the remaining tears. "...So, what did you think they were?"

At this, Sio turned red again, although at this point, she might as well tell him everything she knew. "W-Well, I...heard from, Newton-san, th-that...apparently, there is something...s-similar that, you, can put...inside you. S-So, I thought, m-maybe these could, also..."

From Newton? Well, that certainly explained a lot of things. Adam made a mental note to have a private talk with the blonde later about watching her mouth around the impressionable sniper. Still, he recalled that conversation as well, although he'd been piss drunk at the time and hadn't paid much attention. "...Well, even 'f they...can be used for that, I guess it's not much fun when you...can't get it out."

"...Well, now what?"

"Uh." Good question. Now what? At least the situation had been made clear, but that didn't mean either of them had any more solutions than when they'd started. "Okay, let's just...try and think about it logically for a minute: you're, sure you can't, get it out on your own?"

She gave him a grumpy pout. "What do you think I've been trying to do all this time..."

"Er right, sorry..." Lord, this was going to be difficult. "...I don't suppose we could...just, go to th' med bay..." While he was sure the doctors there had dealt with weirder situations, it would also mean a huge blow to Sio's pride and dignity. "Actually, let's leave that as a last resort; I don't fancy tryin' to explain to them what the hell happened..."

"Y-Yeah...me neither..."

"...Just out of curiosity, how uh, large are these things, anyway...?" A second later the other half of the pair was dropped into his palm, cool and metallic. Huh; so this was what it was? Seemed innocuous enough...unless you were a hyper-curious, high-libido sniper who liked to play around with strange objects.

This wasn't getting anywhere; there were a few ideas floating around in his head, each more embarrassing than the next, but it was all he could go on at this rate. "...Uh, Sio, don't take this th' wrong way or anything, but...mind if I, y'know," he flushed as red as he ever did, "...take a look?"

The sniper turned as red as he did. "Oh! Y-Yeah, of course...n-no, it makes, sense...I can only feel it, at this point..." Slowly, she laid back and opened her legs slightly, although he could sense her reluctance.

"...Sorry...I know this is really embarrassing, but...yer gonna have to open them wider than that..." Not that he was at all calm himself; as far as sexual activity went, it was as vanilla as you could get; a little touching, mutual masturbation maybe before the main event, but anything involving even something as common as oral sex? While he wasn't opposed to it, there was just something...incredibly uneasy about the idea of sticking his tongue in a place like..._that_.

"Is...this better?" She was using her fingers to spread her outer lips open, and Adam felt his head spin from her scent, all musky and could only be described as 'Sio'. Even as bold as she could be during sex, this was one scenario where she had all but hidden her face with her arm, and he couldn't blame her.

"Oh...I think I see it..." Something with a metallic sheen and decorated in the same oriental designs as its partner glistened amongst her folds, slick and shiny. "...Oh man...it's rather...deeper than I thought..."

"_Ahh_...I don't care what method you use, just...p-please, I want it out..."

Well that was obvious; the real question was, **a)** would she be okay with this and **b)**, would it even work? "...Yer really okay with this?"

"Goddammit Adam, I don't want your sympathy, I want your help!" Clearly, she was starting to become frustrated, in more ways than one.

"Oy, 's that how yeh show gratitude t' someone in a situation like this..." Still, if she really meant it... "Then I suggest you brace yourself, squirt."

Sio felt her stomach drop at his words. Brace herself? Was it going to be painful? What was he planning to do? She barely grasped the edge of her pillow in time before something hot and moist wriggled itself between her folds. "_Aaaahh!_ Wh-what, what are you-_ah! Ahh!_"

_'Is he using his...tongue?!'_ It was an entirely different sensation than his fingers, hot and slippery and just slightly textured, and Sio wondered why the hell they hadn't thought of this earlier. "Oh god, Adam...it feels so good!"

He gave some sort of affirmative grunt, but she could barely hear him above her own moans. "B-But, uh-_ahhh_-h-how is, this...g-going to, _haaaah_, help?" He was teasing her clit now, nibbling at it very, very lightly and she screamed, her hips held down only by his iron grip around her thighs. "_Uuuhnnn-hah_, I can't take this anymore-!"

"Tha's th' point," he took a breather and wiped his mouth on his sleeve. It hadn't been as bad as he'd feared, though the taste was...definitely something he'd have to get used to. Well, if it was for her...it'd be worth it. "I figured, maybe if I can make you come hard enough...your own body might naturally push it out."

"O-Oh...good point."

"Is it...okay?" He looked embarrassed all of a sudden, probably shy since he'd never done this to her before. "Sorry...it's not like I have any experience in this area..."

"Nononono, it's, oh god it's amazing..." She could feel her muscles pulsing around the orb, aching for some sort of release. "Please...k-keep, going...I just wanna get this damn thing out..."

"...Got it." She lay down again, but this time, he flipped her legs up so they were over his shoulders instead. "I think it might be better like this..."

Sio could only nod once before that maddening, pleasurable sensation returned, only this time he was less hesitant and more forceful. Which equated to her screaming his name and thrashing against the sheets, groping her own breasts. "Oh god, Adam...A-Adam, I'm...pretty s-sure, I'm c, coming..._oooh_..."

"Tha's good...ow, I know yer excited an' all, but mind not snatching me bald?" He winced as she gave his hair a particularly painful tug as she ground herself against his face. Still, if this was her reaction based on his tongue alone, he could definitely get used to it.

"_Oh! Ooh!_ Shit, I'm coming-!" A wave of hot fluid flooded his mouth, and all he could taste was her-slightly sour but with an underlying sweetness. As she was gasping and heaving from her high, something metal clicked against his teeth.

"Ah hah, gotcha..." Before it could be pulled back in, he dug his fingers around it and forced it out with a moist 'pop', Sio turning completely limp with sheer relief. "So, yer the thing that's been causing all this trouble..."

"Is...is it out? Oh thank you Adam...you don't even know..."

"Well, all's well that ends well, I guess. An' I'm pretty sure yeh learned yer lesson, 'ey squirt?" He wiped the ball up as best he could with a tissue and placed it back next to its twin.

"Y-Yeah...b-but, um, really...thank you. I don't know what I would've done..."

"Don't mention it," he muttered, slightly embarrassed now that he just realized he practically ate her out for the first time.

"...Um, Adam?"

"Yeh?"

"...Do you, want me to take care of that?" She gave his bulging crotch a poke and he jumped. "S-Sorry, it's just...you, really helped me out...a-and made it feel really good in the process, so...I figured, at least, I can pay you back a little..."

He'd been so focused on trying to solve her problem that he hadn't even noticed he was painfully hard, until she'd brought it up. True, he would definitely have to relieve himself sooner or later, but to have her do this so soon... "Uuh, that's...a, nice offer, but, aren't you, tired? Don't worry 'bout me; 's not like, I uh, can't...handle it myself..."

"Oh..." She looked a puppy who'd just been kicked, and he gave himself a mental slap. "...If you're, sure..."

Ah, what the hell; the selfish part of his brain woke up and demanded some sort of reward, especially since she was offering so willingly. "...Okay fine, I lied; it'd definitely be ten times better if you got me off instead..."

Her face brightened instantly, and not for the first time Adam was just a little startled by how quickly she seemed to enjoy sex. And also by the way her mouth was sinking closer to, his..._wait_-

"U-Uh, whoa there, what d'you think yer doin'?!"

"Huh? What do you mean?" She gave him a genuinely puzzled look as she unzipped his pants and firmly grasped his aching member.

"I-I mean, why do you...look like yer about to...suck my dick?"

"Because...I, am? Going to?"

"...Do you even know what you're doing..."

"...Not really, but, I mean...how hard could it be, right?"

And before he could even tell her to watch her teeth, or any of that, she had engulfed the tip in her mouth and he could help but yell, the sensation unlike anything he'd ever felt before. "_Oh shit_-Sio! Jesus..._hnnnggg_...!"

"Hmm mphh?" Not that he could understand what she was trying to say, but the vibrations sent waves of pleasure through his body and he shuddered violently. Her tongue, curiously probing around the new shape in her mouth, and licking all along the underside of the head-he moaned and gripped her head tightly in his arms, feeling like he was about to explode as he jerked his hips towards her mouth, trying not to just force all of himself into her.

"_Agh-hnng_, sh-shit, Sio s-slow down-!"

Was she hurting him somehow? She had been careful to not bite down, but other than that, she could only guess based on his reactions and what gossip she'd heard. Although, judging by the way he was moaning, and threading his fingers through her locks, she wasn't doing half bad.

"_Hah, haaah_-fuck, I'm gonna come..." He didn't want it to end so soon, but it was too much to handle; the moist heat of her mouth, and that soft, nimble tongue that darted into even the tiniest of slits. "_Fuck_-Sio!"

"Mmmrph!" Although he'd given her a split-second warning, still she was taken by surprise as he came into her mouth, all hot and sticky and overflowing down her chin. "_Uwa_...uh oh, I couldn't swallow all of it..." Although to be honest, she didn't like the taste very much-rather too bitter-but she didn't want to hurt his feelings.

"Y-Yeh don't...have to do that..." Really, was there anything hotter than the sight of his girlfriend, all sweaty and naked and attempting to lick his cum off her fingers? "Jesus, yer really somethin' else, Sio..."

"So...?" Grinning, she sidled up next to him, cuddling as they both lay down on the sheets, tired but immensely satisfied. "...Did I do okay?"

"Are you kiddin'? It was great; trust me."

She blushed shyly and nodded. "Oh, good...I'm glad."

Who'd've though that a innocent little gift like that would create all this fuss? Still, at the very least, they managed to resolve the issue without involving anybody else, and with a little bonus as well.

"I guess I should be thankful yeh didn't decide to shove it up your ass..." he muttered tiredly into the pillow, utterly drained.

"What did you say?"

"I-uh, nothing; nothing at all." Best not to give her anymore ideas...he was _not_ going through this again, however pleasurable the outcome ended up being.

"...Say, I wonder if these balls are the same ones that Newton was talking about?" While there was no way Sio was every going to attempt something like that again, there was still one more question she just had to answer. Crawling out from his arms just a tad, she booted up DOGOO's massive database on her holo-screen.

"Tch-'f yeh ask me, those things ain't worth the trouble..." Though he had to admit, he was curious himself as to just what _exactly_ they were. "Hey, what about those?" Peering over her shoulder, he opened the entry to what appeared to be the exact same set of metal balls that were now sitting on her desk.

**Baoding balls (保定健身球):**  
><strong>Also known as 'Chinese exercise balls', they are used to increase muscle dexterity and strength in hands, as well as assist in injury recovery.<strong>

"Ah, so they were just for strengthening your hands after all..." Blushing, Sio swore to herself to just thank Dai Zhong for his gift next time she saw him and leave it at that. However, at the bottom of the entry, there was a little footnote:

***Not to be confused with ben wa balls (阴道球), also known as 'Venus balls', which are usually small, marble-sized balls meant for vaginal insertion and sexual stimulation. They tend to come with a string or cord for easier retrieval.**

Both of them could only stare at the entry, and then each other, and then back at the entry, before dissolving into hysterics.

"Ooh...well, I guess that makes sense now..." Giggling, she shut the device off and placed it back on the table. "See, I wasn't wrong! I just...got them mixed up..."

"Yeh, well let's just be glad I was around. What would you do without me?" Sighing, he scooped her up into his chest, content to take a nap now that this was all over. "...So, is this some sort of hint as t' what I should get you for your birthday...?"

"Adam! Quit messing around..." She smacked him playfully on his arm and he grinned. "Well, if you're really serious about offering..."

"O-Oy! I was just jokin'...sorta..."

"...And if I were to say..._maybe?_" She laughed as he gasped for words that never came. "Relax Adam, I'm just messing with you."

"...I guess we'll see, won't we..."

_Ooh_. Sio wasn't sure what to make of that husky whisper, but she knew she should look forward to it.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Just a quick note: yes, both the items that were mentioned at the end, baoding balls and ben wa balls, do exist and are real things. If you really want to find out more for yourself, wikipedia has fairly comprehensive entries for both. I would probably not recommend googling ben wa balls unless you are feeling really brave.**

**This idea was honestly just sort of random; I do in fact own a set of baoding balls, although it just sits there and frankly I'm not good enough to rotate them without them falling out of my hand (whoops). Both the title and story came about from the fact that, on the wikipedia entries for both items, they each have at the top 'not to be confused with _' and so that got me thinking 'well I bet there's bound to be at least one person out there who's made this mistake' and so ta-da.**


End file.
